Tell me
by sternchan
Summary: Tony stood on the highway bridge, looking down into the river. It was not the first time this week. Ziva went over and looked at him. She watched as he slowly climbed over the railing. Tiva, McAbby
1. Chapter 1

**As alway: I do not own NCIS!**

**This might be a little like ghostwisperer in the beginning.**

**Enjoy**

* * *

Tell me 1

It was dark, cold and raining heavily. Tony stood on the highway bridge, looking down into the river. It was not the first time this week. Ziva went over and looked at him. She watched as he slowly climbed over the railing. There he threw his empty bottle of Vodka down. It was not his first today. She stood still and watched him.

"Ziva." He whispered as he tried to find the strength to jump.

"Tell me Tony. Just say it." She said and touched his hand. She could not feel the rain, the cold or his skin. She was not able to hold him back. The first time he had climbed over the railing she had shouted and screamed at him. She had grabbed his arm and pulled as hard as she could but he had n't even noticed. Instead his mobile rang and he went back to safety, answering it.

There was nothing she could do. If he wanted to jump she would not be able to hold him back, she was partly the reason why he wanted to jump. But it was not in her power to change that fact. She was lying in a hospital bed. In a coma for the last five years and ever since then she was with her team, watching them, listening, not able to make contact. She was a ghost… a restless soul or whatever. No matter how badly she wanted to go back into her body and making it move she could not. She needed to hear the words…

Rain was streaming down on Tony's face, or were those teardrops?

She also climbed over the railing and held on to him. If he would jump she would be at his side, but after that? He would die and she would still be trapped in this lonely non existing form.

"Tell me Tony, tell me and we will be together. I promise, I only need to hear those words once. Like the fairy tale of sleeping beauty… I'm sure you have seen the movie. Tell me!" She begged.

* * *

**Well, would you like to know how it started and if there is a happy ending?**


	2. Chapter 2

_Same day, five years earlier_

Ziva heard her partner stepping out of the elevator. He was talking into his phone loudly.

"Yeah… oh that would be great. No… I don't care; you look stunning in everything you wear… Yes, I know. See you tonight… bye." He ended the call and sat down on his chair, leaning back. "Yes my friends, I have a hot date tonight. Here look at her." Tony said throwing his cellphone over to McGee.

Tim looked at the picture: "Nice." He said with little interest and threw it over to Ziva.

For a moment Ziva thought about not catching it. But then she did. The woman was tall and slender and blond with sparkling blue eyes.

"Pretty. How much did you need to pay her?" she hissed tossing the phone back at Tony.

"Just a DiNozzo smile, Zee-vah!"

She hated it when he did that with her name. She hated him. Everything about him. Or at least she told herself that because it was so much easier than to admit that she loved him.

"Jealous?" Tony asked with a grin.

"Why would I be jealous?" she asked back.

"Because I'm getting laid tonight."

Ziva snorted: "Right. Unlike you, I just do not tend to talk about my private life."

Tony still grinned: "Well when it comes to love-life..." He started but was cut off by Zivas laughter. "What's so funny?"

"Just that you call your lady-for-one-night your love-life." She answered.

"The term is one-night-stand."

"I know I just wanted to be polite." She hissed.

"Would you tell me what's bothering you?"

"You! Just because…"

"Grab your gear, we have a case." Gibbs interrupted their… discussion… as he passed the bullpen on his way to the elevator and they all hurried to follow their boss.

On the way to the scene Tony and Ziva didn't say a word and McGee concentrated on road.

The body was found in a warehouse which was used to store old paper. The high shelves blocked the view from the entrance and the inside was more like a labyrinth. It took Gibbs and his team almost fifteen minutes until they found the dead man. Dust filled the air as they went over. It had been a dry summer and in here it was like they were breathing dust. The paper was not new. Many of it looked as it would turn to dust as soon as it was touched. Tony tried to prove this and made a paper ball which he threw at McGee. It didn't work. The ball hit him in the face and remained just dry paper. But Tony earned himself a head slap from Gibbs for it.

The dead marine – at least they assumed he was one- was dried out like a mummy and Tony made some movie references which earned him another head slap.

McGee started to make pictures.

"Why isn't anyone else here?" Tony asked.

"It was an anonymous call on my cellphone." Gibbs said and bent down to look at the man.

"Tony, go and call Ducky, tell him he has to hurry. And show him the way inside. McGee I want you to look for traces all around the warehouse. Ziva, take pictures in here and look for leads." Gibbs ordered. They all did what he said, as always.

Only a few rows of shelves away Ziva bent down to look at a drop of blood. She didn't remember that the body had been bleeding so she took a picture of it and when she got up she heard the explosion and suddenly all hell broke loose. The whole warehouse was on fire within seconds. Ziva heard Gibbs shouting her name but she was unable to get to him. Burning paper was raining down on her.

"Gibbs!"

"Ziva! Where are you, we need to get out!"

"Gibbs!" The smoke blocked her view and slowly got into her lungs, she started to caught and could not breathe. Panic rose in her but she fought it down and calmed herself. She listened for another call from Gibbs but at the same time she fire got worse and grew louder around her. Now she panicked. "GIBBS!" she screamed and ran off into the direction where she assumed he was. Soon she lost her orientation and the heat became unbearable. Her lungs hurt badly. She felt dizzy. Now she was just looking for a way out but could not find any. Her thoughts went to Gibbs. Surely he was already waiting outside. And Tony would be with him… 'I'll never see him again' She didn't know where this thought came from but with it the tears came and filled her eyes. She'd never be able to tell him how those three important words… "Tony!" she screamed as if it would help anything. TONY!" And then… she felled that this cry was not out of fear but out of pain the fire had reached her skin and her next scream was not a word…

**NCISNCIS**

Ziva stood in the operating room and looked around. The doctors were desperately trying to save their patient's life. They hurried past her but didn't mind her standing there. Maybe they were just to concentrated that they didn't see her. Gibbs stood by her side and his eyes were fixed on the table and the doctors. Both of them were waiting for something to happen. She was not afraid; in fact she didn't feel anything right now. Ziva could not remember how they made it out of the burning hell. She could remember nothing. Suddenly the doctors stepped back.

"It's over… time of death…" he looked at the clock on the wall.

Gibbs turned around. Ziva was confused as she saw a little girl pulling her Boss away.

"Come daddy. Mommy is waiting." She said and they… went through a wall and into a shining light.

Ziva could not believe what she just saw and when she turned back to the doctors and their dead patient it hit her. There was Gibbs on the table. She had just seen his ghost! But how was that possible? Why was she able to see ghosts, it was not possible… unless…

**Tbc**

* * *

**Well as you might have noticed this story will be a lot of drama. My beta-ready says I have a talent for that (but I'm not sure if it was meant as a compliment).**

**Anyway. From now on the story will be about what happened after the fire until the moment on the bridge and after that.**

**Hope you'll still keep reading.**


	3. Chapter 3

**First of all: I'd like to thank you for all those reviews :) Makes me happy to read that you like this story. **

**And now: Enjoy!**

* * *

Ziva left the room. Through the wall … but she found no trace of Gibbs. Since she was able to cross walls she did it with the next and the one after that until she stood in the waiting area of the hospital. Her team was there. All of them. Tim, Abby, Tony, Ducky and Palmer. Ziva was relieved at least they were fine. Abby walked up and down, nervous. Tim was trying to calm her. Ducky and Palmer were talking quietly and Tony… he was just sitting there. His elbows on his knees face hidden in his hands.

_Hey._ She whispered but they didn't hear her.

And then one of the doctors walked towards them. He had taken off his surgical gown. Abby stopped walking and looked at him. Even Tony looked up.

"Family of Jethro Gibbs?"

They just stared at him and Abby nodded slowly. "Is he going to be okay?"

The doctor seemed to fight with himself: "I'm sorry…" he said and Ziva could see the tears that formed in Abby's eyes. "… we lost him." The doctor ended the sentence.

Abby cried out and McGee was suddenly by her side to catch her as she started to sob uncontrolled. She buried her face in his shirt and Ziva was suddenly sure… Abby would never be the same again. Gibbs had been a farther to her, her rock, her knight and her superhero. She could almost feel the pain Abby was in right now. Although she could not cry herself. She knew Gibbs was fine. He was with his daughter and wife.

Tony looked like he would throw up any second. And with a very lost expression he looked over at Ducky who stared that the doctor, trying to make sense of the things he just heard. Palmer went over to McGee and Abby.

Ziva hates it, seeing them like this. She wanted to tell them, Gibbs was alright. _He is okay. He is with his daughter and wife._ Ziva said but they could not hear or see her. For a moment Ziva wanted nothing more than to cry with them. The loss of Gibbs suddenly hit her hard, even though she knew better. Just looking at Abby and Palmer crying broke her heart. But she had important questions. That needed to be answered. Gibbs had gone and she was still here. She had not been able to simply follow him and meet her brother and so many others. Why? And why was no one asking the question she wanted to have an answer for? Had they forgotten about her? She looked over at them and wished with all her heart that somebody would ask.

And Ducky did: "Ziva?"

Abby looked up from McGee's shoulder. Suddenly they all tensed. Ziva felt the fear rising in her. Abby simply seemed to panic. She was afraid of the answer. Ziva knew it. Abby had lost her parents, her friend Kate and Gibbs…

"Still in surgery." The doctor answered and added: "But it's not looking good."

It took a few seconds until the message hit them. Abby cried harder this time. And she didn't stop. An hour passed. Ziva sat with them, waiting for news from the doctors; waiting for… she didn't know maybe her sister to come and take her away, or her brother, her mother or so many friends she had lost? Gibbs maybe? That moment she wished that the doctors would not be able to save her life. She wanted to be with her family. And then she looked at Tony. He was leaning back into his chair. His head rested on the wall, he was pale. She sat next to him and laid her hand on his. He didn't feel it and she could not tell if his hand was cold or warm.

She didn't know why she could go through walls and touch someone. His phone rang and pulled him back into reality. Ziva could see the caller-id. It was this woman but he ignored the call.

Another hour passed and Abby went to the chapel to pray for Gibbs. Ziva followed her. She was afraid Abby would lose it and she told McGee to stay behind. Now she was kneeing in front of the cross. Ziva hesitated before she went into the chapel. Nothing happened. No lightning, no other ghosts came to stop her. She went over to her friend. Abbs was now almost lying on the floor unable to say a word, she was just sobbing hardly. Ziva went down next to her and embraced her softly and somehow Abby calmed and said: "You would not take her from us would you?"

Ziva was confused for a moment she had thought Abby could feel her, that she knew she was there, but Abby's eyes where fixed on the wooden cross.

"Please." She whispered, her eyes red from crying: "You took Gibbs… leave us Ziva."

"Abby?" That was McGee he came over and gathered her up from the floor: "Ziva is out of surgery, the doctor said, we can see her now."

Abby turned around and looked back at the cross and whispered quietly "Thank you."

But Ziva thought there was nothing to thank for as she saw her body. It was almost completely covered with gauze. Only half of her face was visible and many medical devices where attached to her mouth… Abby sobbed again. Palmer and Ducky seemed to suspect what was under the gauze and looked with horror and questions in their eyes to the doctor who stood with them in the room. McGee was holding Abby up again and Tony… he was just staring at her body. Ziva could see despair, fear und pain in his eyes and it scared her more than the view of her body.

tbc

* * *

**Keep reading :)**


	4. Chapter 4

„Is she… is she…" Abby started but could not finish. New tears were streaming down her face.

"Is she in pain?" McGee asked the question Abby wanted to have an answer for.

Ziva tried to feel her body but there was nothing. How could there be? She was not inside.

The Doctor shook his head: "Not right now. We gave her a lot of pain medication…"

"She will be okay, right?" Abby asked before he could finish.

The doctor hesitated just a little too long and then caught Ducky's eyes. Somehow he spoke to him: "Ninety percent of her skin is burned. Mostly second and third degree some fourth, which is not so bad because if she wakes up the places with fourth degree will not hurt her. But she inhaled a lot of hot smoke, her lungs are in a very bad condition, she might never be able to breathe without pain. As soon as some of the less damaged skin has recovered we can try to transplant it to other places…"

"And why do you want to do that!?" Tony asked angrily and the doctor was shocked by his sudden outburst.

"Well it would make her look…"

"Why would we care how she looks? You just told us she is not able to breathe without pain. Why would it bother us how her skin looks?" Tony's anger grew more and more until Ducky touched his elbow.

"Tony… calm down we…"

Tony simply ripped his arm away and stormed out of the room. Ziva thought about following him for a second but she stayed. She wanted to know more about her condition.

"Is he her husband?" the doctor asked.

"No, just a friend." McGee answered. "A close friend."

"Will she wake up?" Abby wanted to know, she was not following the discussion. She had sat down next to bed and grabbed Ziva's hand which was covered in gauze. Ziva looked at her. She could not feel Abby's hand. It made her sad because right know she desperately needed some comfort. And the feeling of someone nearby would have done that. It didn't matter that she saw them all in this room. She was close to tears and she did not want to be alone. Would she be able to follow them when they left or was she trapped in this building?

"We already called doctor Morrison, she is a expert in such matters. She'll be able to help and coordinate the skin transplant…"

Ziva's mind drifted off by looking at her body. Tony said it would not matter how she looked but Abby still cried. Ziva herself somehow felt strangely isolated from the thought of her physical health. It was like her body didn't matter. She was not sad about it. No, she had learned that her body was just a tool to get information. She had used it well and it held the collection of her scars. At least the visible ones. Of course she had always cared for it. Tried to be fit and strong and healthy but that was only to be able to fight for others and only in the last resort to protect herself from getting hurt. To her, her soul was more important. She had trusted various men with her body but never with her soul. The realization that she would have to go back into it – that she could not live without it- was far away now. Only a very low voice in the back of her mind whispered: "You would have loved to feel Tony's arms around you." But maybe she would die anyway. Gibbs could be here to lead her away any minute. She looked around, no Gibbs. Her mood fell. She did not want to be here.

Because of those thoughts she had missed the conversation between her family and the doctor. When she focused back on Ducky she saw that the doctor had left and Ducky was just about to leave the room. She could not stand seeing Abby cry so she followed him. Tony stood in the corridor talking into his phone.

"I need to see you… I don't know, now would be good…. Yes I know… yeah… see you tonight. Bye." Tony ended the call.

Ducky stepped up to him in silence and Tony smiled sadly. "Maria, my girlfriend." He said.

Ducky nodded: "You need distraction?"

"Yeah… Gibbs is dead and I can't do anything for Ziva right now. .." Tony answered but Ziva had the feeling as if he wanted to add something. He didn't.

Her heart felt like it was shattered into a million pieces. Of course she knew he was dating someone. He was always dating someone, but right now? Gibbs just died some hours ago and she was almost dead and Tony simply wanted to go and have sex with his girlfriend? When she saw Tony leaving she felt more alone than ever. She reached out for his arm and touched him but he did not feel it. He didn't feel anything

Because she did not know where to go she spent the time in her hospital room looking at her body, trying to go back inside and wake up. It didn't work. She waited. For Gibbs or her mother, her sister, Ari… anyone to come and free her. But no one was there. Her friends came in often. Abby showed up a lot and Ducky told her about the Lady he had met a few weeks ago. A doctor Morrison came to have a look at her. She told the other to keep talking because maybe she could hear them and would wake up sooner. When her friends were not there Ziva sat on the chair listening to the low beep of the heart monitor wishing for the long beep to come and with it Gibbs. Time didn't matter to her and she was surprised when Abby came in and said:

"Ziva it's now a week, you know. It would be nice of you to wake up."

Ziva looked at her. She had not counted Abby's visits or McGee's or the others. She had not left the room or the hospital.

"Did Tony visit you?"

"_No he didn't. But Ducky stopped by; he said he would meet an old lady friend today." _Ziva said but Abby didn't hear.

She kept talking about Tony_: "_It would be good if he did. We have not seen him the whole week. Vance told us all to go home. We do not have cases right now. But I'm still trying to catch the guy who burnt down the warehouse." Abby nodded to mark her words.

Ziva looked at her; there was no point in answering.

"We'll get him. I promise…Gibbs' funeral is tomorrow. I'm afraid… Ziva, please wake up. I need your support. I have McGee and he is being really nice but you are my best friend. Please." The last word was a raspy whisper. Ziva could see the pain and the fear in Abby's eyes but she could not wake up. She was trapped. But maybe she'd be able to go to Gibbs' funeral.

She didn't know where it would be so she simply followed Abby when she left the building. It was a nice sunny evening and Ziva was happy to be able to go outside. She sat next to Abby in her car and Abby drove off. But Abby did not head back to her place instead she stopped at McGee's. Ziva was not surprised. Abby could always turn to Tim when she was down but when she saw McGee stepping up to her and kiss her she felt left out. No, she really should not stay here.

But where would she go? Gibbs place came to her mind and she went. It was strange to walk and not walk on the streets of the city. She traveled fast without taking a bus or something else. She went through walls and cars and people. She could touch them but also pass through them. Within minutes she arrived at Gibbs house. There was already someone else. Gibbs father was packing up the stuff of his son, constantly sobbing.

"_He is happy now."_ Ziva tried to explain even though she knew it was pointless.

Jackson broke down on Gibbs couch: "It's not fair."

He sobbed again and again. Ziva could not stand it. She wanted to shake them all to tell them that Gibbs was with his family and that death would not be the end of everything but the beginning of being with the people they love. She was sure about that now but she was unable to tell them. Ziva looked at him helplessly. She did not want to see them hurt, she wanted them happy and she wanted a place to stay for the night. But there was no place for her. She was sure Jackson would not appreciate that she saw him like this, neither would the others. Jimmy was probably with his wife, McGee with Abby, Ducky with his old lady friend and Tony surely with his girlfriend. She was alone. Hell, only one week and she was out of their lives. On her way out she saw the invitation to the funeral and read the address. Well, now she could go back to the hospital and head for the graveyard in the morning. That seemed to be her place. Next to her so uncooperative body.

When she stepped into the corridor of the hospital she saw a slender woman walking up and down in front of the door to her room. She had long wavy blond hair and beautiful blue eyes. To Ziva she was not very sympathetic and the look on her face reinforced that impression. She looked angry and constantly took out her mobile phone to check the time. Ziva decided that she did not need to care about that and went into her room.

She stopped when she saw Tony there, holding her hand. What was he doing here? He did not say a word simply held her hand and looked at her. The constant beep of the heart rate monitor made the silence in the room almost unbearable.

"_Talk to me."_ She whispered.

Then the door opened and the woman looked inside.

"Finished?" she asked.

Tony got up. "Bye Ziva." He said.

"_No, don't leave! Don't go Tony please. Stay please…"_ Ziva called after him but he had already left.

**NCISNCIS**

The next morning she went to the graveyard and waited for the others to arrive. She was still angry with herself. How was it possible that she had not felt Tony's presence at her bedside? There must have been something. Okay she was not able to feel anyone's touch but… no! She cursed for thinking such stupid things. Of course it was impossible to know that he would be there if she was just wandering the streets. It made her angry, know that she had seen him there she realized that she had lounged for his visit and now missed it. What if his girlfriend would keep him away from her now? Would he ever visit her again?

More and more people arrived. Every available Agent of NCIS was there; the SecNav and director Vance. The priest started to talk and then she saw him. Gibbs was standing on the other side of the crowd looking at them. He caught her eyes and waved her over.

"_It's going to be alright. He is here to pick me up. To show me the way to Thali and my mother and Ari. I don't have to stay here and see the tears of my friends."_ She told herself and within seconds she stood next to Gibbs.

"I'm not here to take you with me, Ziver." He said softly with a sad smile on his face.

Ziva stopped and looked at him. "But why not? Am I not allowed to… to go and have some peace? Why… I tried to life a good live… Gibbs I…"

He softly laid a finger upon her lips and she could feel his warmth. She could feel his touch! "Not yet. You are still alive. You do not belong with the dead yet." He said. "Walk with me." They made their way over to a small lake, away from the funeral and sat down.

"But I don't want to be here Gibbs. I want to wake up or leave but this existence…"

"I know. But it's not your time. Maybe you'll wake up and live on fifty years."

"Maybe?"

"Nobody knows the future. All we can do is hope for the best."

They remained silent for some time. "Are you happy now Gibbs?" Ziva wanted to know.

"Yes I am. Very happy." His smile was like a sunrise.

"I want to be happy to." Tears gathered in her eyes.

"You'll need to hear the words."

"What words?"

"The words from Tony. You know them, Ziva. You know what he must tell you." Gibbs voice was soft and caring and full of love. He was behaving like a real father. "I wish it would be easier. I wish I could help but I cannot. I have to go soon and I won't come back."

"Why?" Zivas voice broke, she cried.

"Because we are only allowed to come to our funeral to see our loved ones once more until they continue with their lives."

"And you used the chance to talk with me instead of watching them."

"You need me more." He said and drew her into his arms.

"Will you come and pick me up, when it's over?" she asked.

"You don't want your sister or mother?"

"No… Please Gibbs promise me." she sobbed.

He held her closer than her own father ever did. "I promise. But remember… you need to hear the words. He needs to tell you."

"Tell me…" she whispered and wished it would all be over.

Tbc

* * *

**Well… tell me! Tell me what you think :)**


End file.
